Revolutionary Road was pretty good. not amaaazing or the best movie of the year or anything, but pretty good. interesting. enjoyable. i'd see it again. kate and leo are good together, honestly. i've never been the hugest fan of Dicaprio, but i like him a lot more than i ever used to, especially when he's coupled up with her.

i watched the Hepburn version of Little Women the other day, too. it was good, but i'll never love any version of that film more than the newer one.

let's see. there was actually something specific i wanted to put in here, but now i can't remember what.

i have a lot of movies i have at the house that need to be watched. Jeff let me borrow about four, and i've only watched one (the film Freaks, which i'd already seen, but Mom hadn't, gooble-gobble!). now i still need to watch Hearts in Atlantis, A Mighty Wind, and something else by the same director as the second one. forget the name.

i rented Hellboy, which i've never seen before, but i've wanted to for awhile now, so James and i are going to hit that one up this weekend! yeah!

that's about it! i need to get back into reading some novels, all i've been reading are zines lately. and i need to at least try and push myself to keep working on my own zine[s].

the Regina gig i was supposed to attend is happening next week. i'm selling the ticket on eBay. sob.

mim and gramps will be here in a couple weeks!

what an awful, awful weekend. i had the worst fucking case of a cold i've ever had possibly my whole life, so i seriously didn't do anything. i didn't watch anything, i didn't read anything, i barely spoke to anyone because every time i tried to no sound came out. it was actually pretty scary.

i'm still sick, but i'm climbing my way back towards normal now so i'm just utterly grateful. i remember when i was a kid i used to like getting sick, because it meant i could stay home from school, watch TV and get to watch all the cartoons i never got to see during the day. nowadays, i'd just rather go to work. not because i don't want to part with a vacation day, but being sick isn't that fun anymore. i don't know, when i was a kid it just didn't seem to affect me much. i didn't get sick then as much as i do now, anyhow. i can only remember one really bad case of mono and that's about it. anyhow.

i read a zine today though, about a prostitute and her clientele. THAT was interesting.

i went to math tonight, and i think i did learn something, too. now i'm going to do my Astronomy and maybe watch a film before i head off to bed. got work in the morning. goodnight!

this weekend was actually really, really nice, considering i didn't really do anything. for one thing, the boyfriend and i have been as horny as rabbits on viagra and i've been a naughty, naughty little girl. THAT was fun.

i'm actually really tired tonight, and i need to go to bed very soon, but i wanted to write in here, do some homework, and straighten my room first. i'll only be another hour or so.

on the flip side of this whole pent up sexual frustration, i've also been incredibly lonely. which, you know, may be WHY i've been going off like a roman candle and all. Ashley craves contact with another human being. it's been far too long, now. i don't know what i'll do if i have to wait too much longer. i try, i mean i really try, to throw myself into my books and my studies and my music or films or something of that nature to get my mind off it. reading seems to be the best escape for me. i need to make another zine. i think that will make me feel happy.

god knows there's plenty enough going on to keep me busy. i need to start doing some early xmas shopping, i need to save money for new car tires, and a hotel for Shannon's wedding. god, i hate money. it always makes me feel blue as hell. [Holden Caufield].

so, my Psychology of Adjustment class. eh. she keeps forcing us to talk about our feelings and shit. i don't like it. i don't like talking about things that make me stressed. i always try my hardest to shove that shit to the back of my mind, because worrying is a waste of time! it's like the whole purpose of the class is for us to adjust and recognize our behavior patterns that affect us negatively, but all it's doing is making me remember i actually have problems, and i like to play the denial game.

right, so i'm going to go do my maths homework now.

so far, i have absolutely no complaints about any of my teachers this semester, or if i do, they are so petty and minimal i feel foolish even stating them. so, that's good. i'm actually... enjoying the classes. even College Algebra. i know! it's weird. i wouldn't be surprised if this changes in a week or two, though.

i read a zine last night called 17 Strangers. and oh my god, i loved this one part so much, i'm going to type it out here-

One time, when I was growing up but still living at home with my mom, a rabbit family moved into her small herb garden out back. A mother rabbit made a little nest for her babies underneath a bushy herb plant, which my mom noticed one day because she saw something under there that looked like an animal. It startled her for a moment because she thought it was something dead. But it was the nest. Apparently rabbits make nests from fluffs of fur and other soft things. A kind of wild mattress ticking.

The mother had her tiny, trembly babies there and for a few weeks we had sightings of them from the kitchen window. There was just one time that I was able to get close to one of them. I happened to be out in the yard, mincing through the wet grass toward the garden to cut a few sprays of one of the plants for cooking - basil or rosemary, probably. A still summer day; the air was thick and close and the sun was warm on my arms and the top of my head. And sitting right there in front of me was a tiny brown baby, no bigger than the palm of one of my small hands. Because it was so new, so foolish, it wasn't afraid of me, and it just sat there as I crunched down to look closer. Its ears were comically outsized and almost diaphanous - I could see the red veins in them. It held perfectly still, and because it was so small its heartbeat made it dip back and forth. This is what I remember about this rabbit and have thought about many times since.

A few years later I was looking at a book on American Sign Language and I learned that the ASL word for animal is formed by pressing your hands together at the blades, palms facing your chest, and rocking them open and closed. The book explained that this mimics the motion of an animal's heartbeat rocking its whole body. I can't tell you how beautiful I think it is, the idea that this striking moment - which I'd thought belonged only to me and this tiny rabbit I met once - would be considered central enough to animal existence that it is its NAME. A heartbeat so strong it makes you sway.

<3

i wrote this really personal entry just now. but i decided i can't post it here. mainly because this blog, well, it has a reputation for being boring and i don't want to let down all my faaaaans.

also, i put the link to this blog on my facebook and myspace, which means just about everyone i know can read it. we can't have that!

so i posted the personal stuff to my personal, secret e-diary and it's all good.

so what's goin' on, besides what i don't want to say?

nothing, really. i had the laziest weekend in the history of the world. instead of staying on task and doing what i should have, such as school work, and laundry--OH SO EXCITING--i sat around in a nighty watching far too much TV. so, there you have it.

i DID, however: play with my nephew; wash my bed sheets; watch 2 episodes of 30 Rock; watch several movies, and all my Netflix; make a mixed cd for my car.

yee-haw.

now i gotta finish my fucking math homework. holla.

fuck three day weekends. they only bring out the lazy in me.

today is my last day of "freedom" [though how free am i, REALLY?], and i'm going to straighten the room, do homework, possibly go to the movies later. and that's about it.

i'm on an extended lunch because my boss is absent minded. he asked me to pick him up this morning from the car shop, and he left his brief case in the side car, so he asked me to pick it up while i took my lunch. i moaned and complained, so he allowed me to leave 45 minutes early. there certainly are perks to being the bosses favorite. i dunno how i got into that position actually, i'm usually nobodies favorite, but he likes me!

wee.

plans for the weekend? i dunno! i've been anxiously awaiting some feedback for Agnes Briggs: Fairy Tale Stories. i know that's silly, since i only just sent them out like a few days ago. and i already know i probably won't be accepted into any distros. but it would be amazing if i did. i need to keep writing, and creating, and reading. so i can strive harder.

i guess other than that, i'll try to start reading some of my Astronomy and Psychology books... we don't really have any assignments due until late next week, but i really should try not to leave all my reading until the last night. plus, i have a maths test next week, and i need to do my homework.

why the fuck am i so boring.

oh well. i have a thing for Christopher Knight. i'd totally do him.