this side of the blue

i'm back!

i got in last night around 7-ish. i've got this massive pile of laundry and other suitcase items strewn over the hallway outside my room. i threw all my dirty jeans into the laundry but haven't bothered doing anything else yet. i'm putting off schoolwork like fuck because i'm all paranoid about it now that i know i'm behind and i missed 2 math classes while i was on Holiday and basically, i'm frightened of failing. but i need TO CALM DOWN because i seriously do this every single semester. yes, the thought "i'm going to fail, i'm going to fail!' actually pitter-patters through my mind at some point each semester, and i always get A's! that makes me sounds sick or something.

but i digress. England was lovely. well if you want to know the truth, England was kind of annoying because the weather was mostly bad (cold and rainy though not freezing), but this actually had little to no effect on what a nice time i had, apart from not being able to see the Penguins or do much of anything. however, that was sort of the plan, to not do anything. just laze around with my boyfriend, sex, sexy stuff, cuddle, laugh, watch films, share meaningful glances, hang out with his family, eat, drink, and spoon while sleeping.

and now here i am back in the warmth of Florida in my parents house and apart from being in my comfort zone and squeezing my dog and playing with my nephew nothing all that great has presented itself, because i really do not want to go to work tomorrow or school either. i will anyway though, you do what you gotta do.

i'm going to try to finish my christmas zine today, if i can. or at least make a dern good start on it. the goal is to have posted them all by next weekend. which means i'm on a tight schedule since i have lots of other things to think about, too. god!

here's the list so far on WHO is getting an ashley x-mas zine:

james
david
esther
mom
shannon
melissa
jen
christina
mim + gramps
erin
jeff
ryan

and possibly a few more.